I just finished reading “What some of you were”. In fact, it only took me two days to read it (maybe 3 or 4 hours all up).
It’s a great book. I found it helpful, rebuking, and also helped me in my faith, as well, as people shared their stories, including the way that God worked in their lives and through their struggles to increase their faith in Him. The way that some of them kept looking to the cross was a great reminder that all Christians should do the same no matter what struggle they are going through.
For the particular struggles that this book covers, that is, struggling with unwanted homosexual feelings and actions, the stories provide a really good insight into what it’s like to feel those feelings, the failure of that lifestyle to fulful their emotional, spiritual and relational needs, and the ways that Christians had responded to them. The most helpful thing for a Christian to do for someone struggling with homosexuality (or who are affected by it) is to just be a friend, listen and pray for and with them, to help them find resources, Christian counsellors and support groups. We need to keep reminding them of God’s love and forgiveness.
If there’s anything missing from this book, it’s reminding and teaching people about the value of singleness. While there is hope for change for those who have same-sex feelings, some may still be attracted to their own sex, and not to the opposite sex. Several people told how they decided to get married to hopefully ‘cure’ their attractions, but it ends up causing their spouse and family, and themselves, much pain. The bible is clear that homosexual relations are not fitting for God’s people. The only other option in this case is to choose to remain single and celibate – this is really hard, when we have such a deep need for close relationships. But singleness is a gift from God to be used for his glory. Perhaps it wasn’t the goal of the book, but I imagine it would be helpful, if it were there, for anyone who read it.
I don’t really know anyone who has unwanted feelings like these. I know a few people in same-sex relationships. At the moment, the only people I can recommend this book to are Christians who want to know more about how to help people that they know, or even to just understand the issues so that they’re better equipped when the opportunity arises.